Sunday, February 23, 2014

We Need To Dig Up Thomas Edison

We need to dig up Thomas Edison. We have a job for him. Looks like he's the only one who can do it.

Cutting to the chase: He did not invent the light bulb. He improved on it. Flip the switch, bulb is on and doing the job. Flip the switch off, done. Off/on/off/on/off/on/off.

The bulb is working, the moment we power it up, and it's rested and ready the moment we power it down.

Cars do this stuff, too.

But it's really too bad that we put up with sluggish performance with our high-falutin' productivity toys like desktop computers and laptops and tablets and phones.

I'll prove to you what a sheep you are.

I already know you have a computer or tablet or phone on (so you can read this). Go get another device, one that's powered down.

Ready? Turn it on.

Now, we're going to have a little discussion about all the performance problems you'd think we'd scream about and bully the manufacturers into fixing. But we don't, because we are growing wool.

Have a phone that rotates the screen or pauses it or reconfigures it just because you set the phone down or rotated the thing? For heaven's sake, WHY?  Lightbulbs work in all configurations, the same exact way, in case you're unfamiliar with a flashlight.

Is the toy now powered up and ready to use, yet?

Didn't think so.

I'm typing this on a Chromebook, one of the few outliers in the toy department. Power on, work. Power off, all done.

I like "done". "Done" is the best part.

Done getting ready. Done working for me.

Notice I'm not a Luddite, but until a few so-called world-class big manufacturers stop making prank hardware for sheep who don't care, I won't purchase their products, and I'd really like to buy a riotous assortment of them. Most look potentially fun.

Okay, bazillions of people will buy them anyway.

Well, this is the electronic version of "The Emperor's New Clothes".

Ominous sound goes here:


Wednesday, February 12, 2014

The Dish On The Super Bowl, And Other Sporting Activities

Anyone care to tell me what this crap-o-matic thing is in the middle of my text panel, and why some do-good meat-wad decided I have to have it? Why do people do this without leaving some info, such as, "My name is Homer Guelph, and I'm a 4th level tech with Google, and I thought you'd have some some kind of paroxysm of thrill if I just stuck this on your blog by surprise, and you can't possibly get rid of it. Aren't I just the most very special person on this planet since the unicorn?" No, you aren't. Google, quit deciding for me what I want and what I don't want for "improvements". Frankly, what I want--and I intend to get--is for Google to take a flying bite, dry up and blow away, and plunge into a catastrophic and unrecoverable business cycle, with corporate headquarters relocating to an unflushed toilet. 
No One Else's Opinion, Either