F!

I suspect I did something hideous in the womb to be born into a language as forlorn as English.

Before I go further, the title does not refer to "forlorn", or "further."

I'll get to that in a moment.

First, a peeve.

Is there one English word in common usage that refers to turning on a light?

Not that I know.

For "turning off", you can use the word for a fire, "douse", I suppose. Sounds awkward, though.

I realize that the U.S. had the happy opportunity to steal the King's English and make it better, and it has, in some respects, but not perfectly, as you can see.

That's bad enough.

What I feel is worse is the overuse of expletives.

I can't believe anyone is angered to the point where they'd use one about every third word.

What do they say when they're totally and completely torqued off? "Oh, crudsy?"

They have nothing left in their ammo belt.

And I'd like to see a better expression of the respect and dignity I know they have, if they'd elect to show it.

They may switch off, to other words beginning with other letters. Then again, probably not.

Settling for particular expletives seems to be the kind of habit I see when people put on comfortable old slippers, instead of severe language like this. Really? You'd wear the slippers but not say those things in front of your mother.

Furthermore, the word I reference is a vulgar term for what is the most beautiful experience two people can enjoy between them. I don't understand.

I've given myself migraines trying to get around this, avoid this, and never while needing Valium.

I rarely have the urge to even use the term H-E-double hockey sticks.

I'm not totally against that, or any other coarse word. If the occasion demands it and no other word will do, then feel free to launch it with the full power and effectiveness demanded.

Other than that, I wish people could do better. Really. I'd be proud of them, and they'd realize they really don't mean what they say, the message being ignored and missed through needless repetition.

I want to help. I want to make them better. I want to lead them by example. I want them to understand that communicating with the world at large may bring them rewards and more prosperity in their days by mastering their tongues. They could enter better circles of people.

But I don't think that'll happen. This is a fool's errand.

I don't think I'm better than they are for this, really.

I'm so lost, so confused, so saddened.

Oh crudsy.